Monday, May 7, 2012

You may not want to read this one

I am going to be honest. I am in a pissy mood. I am feeling really depressed lately about the adoption. I think it is  just because I am so tired of just waiting. I feel like that is all you really do when you are adopting. You wait on other people. Wait wait wait. And that's where we are at. Just waiting.

I think what else is bothering me is that I desperately miss Shaina. I am really needing a Haiti trip right now so I can hold my lovey again. But due to a loved one's health issues, there is no way I can leave now, or anytime in the foreseeable future. And that just sucks.

For the rest of you adopting parents out there; do you ever have those moments where it just doesn't feel real?  It doesn't feel like it will ever happen and you won't ever have your little one home?  It has been feeling like that for me lately.  I stare at photos of video of her and wonder if she will ever get to come home.

Have I depressed you yet? Sorry if I have. But I know most of you reading this know exactly how I am feeling because you are, or have been, there too.

Ok, that is enough of my rambling for today.

Thanks for listening!


  1. Do I feel like this isn't real? All...the...time.

  2. Oh my - I so feel your pain. Rosa is a picture to us. Almost 12 months in IBESR. No one should have to wait this long.

    You feel hopeless, helpless, frustrated.

    I'm so sorry. I we lived closer I'd share a glass of wine with you.

  3. Didn't I almost write this exact post a few days ago? lol - Yes, I often feel that this isn't real. That it will never come to an end - and that in the end I'll have that child in my arms. I dream about it, but then I don't because it just seems insane to dream about something that feels like it will never happen! I guess if we didn't have these frustrated beyond measure days... it would mean we didn't really care right?
    Hoping that the health issues your loved one is dealing with will be resolved very soon.

  4. You are not alone! Praying for your Mommy heart today. I know exactly how hard it is. We've been in IBESR since July... waiting has become the norm for us as well. Hugs!!!

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